it seems the people who i really care about end up leaving me behind in one way or another and i can’t seem to pinpoint why im always left in the dirt or why i always end up feeling this way but i mean i don’t know

gross today was a turning point for my feelings about you and stuff and im more on the unforgiving stage or i just have a grudge stuck i need to let that go
it seems…. to be realistic…. you don’t really care about me as you say you do and as much as i care about you sigh

whatever man 2 more weeks we are done with school

mr ford makes me happy sometimes bc hes actually a really good teacher and i appreciate his personality i believe he carries stories with him and he gives them out for the world to pass on and i love that and i love how he uses his experiences for learning purposes for us to apply and hes pretty funny at the same time
today he made me appreciate how we need to enjoy life now because really, all we ever do is hope and or complain for the next thing and we end up thinking about the future all the time and never fully grasp and love the present blah blah blah

yesterday was pretty cool, i mean i had a good day and then i learned some sad stuff that i dont think i should talk about on here but i realized how scary rape is and how traumatizing the whole experience is along with the whole rape victim thing with the policeand how strong people can be and i just yeah

i had a pretty awesome week though
i spent a lot of time with my mom which was good and trisha and i are closer bc shes getting into korean bands which is totally out of the blue

no one really reads these but i never write in my journal anyway so this is nice

night
(Im not going to the beach tomorrow)

♡♡♡♡ cale

5) Everyday is an ongoing struggle with peer pressure and instantly regretting my decision. One time when I was around 11, I allowed my friend to cut my hair, since she said she cut her mom’s hair and she ended up cutting an uneven random layer in my hair. I can’t remember any more things because there is honestly so much. But I feel like they’re sort of essential to life and growing and all.

10) I’m going to this place in San Diego called Shelter Island with some friends.

11) I’ve been strictly drinking smoothies in the morning, and today I had an avocado banana smoothie!

- Warsan Shire  (via kordei)

- Aimee Carter (via ryannxp)

I finally found one that isn't lame and super long

• 1. If you’ve ever tried drugs or alcohol, what was your reason for first trying it?
• 2. Do you think you could ever have an abortion if you unexpectedly turned up pregnant right this second?
• 3. If you were far from home and needed to sleep for the night, would you choose to rent a crappy motel room for $60 or sleep in your car for free?
• 4. Is there a color shirt you’d NEVER wear?
• 5. Is there a situation where you caved into peer pressure and regretted it?
• 6. What is your favorite video game console? Why?
• 7. Do you like vanilla candles?
• 8. Have you ever been in a relationship that was going great, and then suddenly something weird happened and you just KNEW it was going to be over soon?
• 9. Would you ever bleach your hair platinum blonde?
• 10. What are your plans for tomorrow?
• 11. What did you have for breakfast?
• 12. Have you had sex in 2013 yet?
• 13. Who last slept in your bed besides you?
• 14. What time did you wake up today?
• 15. How long until your next birthday?
• 16. What was the last movie you watched?
• 17. If you could see any musician live, front row, who would you choose?
• 18. When did you last consume something that had peanut butter?
• 19. What’s the last song you heard?
• 20. When you say you love someone, do you mean it?
• 21. Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?
• 22. Do you still talk to any of your ex’s?
• 23. As of this minute, what is going through your mind?
• 24. Where’s the last place you went?
• 25. Have you held hands with anyone lately?
• 26. Has anyone let you down recently?
• 27. Does it bother you when people try to make you jealous?
• 28. Whats the next movie you want to see in theaters?
• 29. Do you have more than $50 in your room?
• 30. Are both of your blood parents still in your life?
• 31. Were you tired when you woke up this morning?
• 32. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?
• 33. When was the last time you went apple picking?
• 34. Do you sometimes wake up in the morning, lay in bed and think about life?
• 35. Are you happy summer is coming soon?
• 36. Do you have drama in your life?

arkhams:

hey … so,.. uhh… (looks at notecards) did you uh did …you fall out of heaven because um (drops cards) shit fuck oh god fuck im so sorry  youre-youre just s o.pretty i m soryr

when you said that i couldnt even finish the text i got my clothes turned on the shower started to cry as i walked in and ended up bawling my EYES OUT in the bathroom for an hour including the shower

it honestly hurts me more to see you go and im just going to miss you so much next year

people honestly dont know how close we are probably bc we dont display it as much as you and her do or me and her but i mean im ok with that but i just want YOU to know how much your friendship has impacted my life and how much i care for you and your family since basically you are like my extended family and i love you guys so much because we both exchanged our love for each other throughout the years like really my parents and especially my dad care about you so much because youre practically like my sister
im sad we wont be doing much stuff together anymore since we had so much planned and im sad that its all taken away im sad youre moving so far im sad that im going to miss you so much and i dont even think i can look at you tomorrow or else i might start crying again like i am now

saddumbgirl:

idk if you say possesive things like “you’re mine” i get all melty and weird and will probably fall in love with you 

ZELO